The conversation about the throat
Not a how-to. A way of talking about the one item on the list that kills people.
Why it works
This is the point on the list where the difference between talking and doing is largest. A conversation where it is said from the start that nothing is going to happen makes it possible to find out what the pull actually consists of. For many it turns out to be about weight, hands or surrender, and those can be had in other ways.
How to do it
- 01
Say out loud at the start that nothing happens tonight and nothing happens this week. This is a conversation and it stays one. This page, and any page like it, is the wrong place to learn a technique.
- 02
Say what the pull actually consists of: the hands, the weight, the surrender, the look of it. Naming it honestly often shows there is something far less dangerous underneath that you can both have.
- 03
If it is still there afterwards, the next step is not each other. It is people who know, a doctor about your own health, and experienced people about what they actually do, before anything at all.
What usually goes wrong
The conversation slides into an attempt the same evening. Not here it does not. If the interest is still there afterwards, the next step is not each other but somebody who knows: a doctor about your health, experienced people about the rest. Pressure on the neck can stop a heart in seconds, without warning and without marks.
Pressure on the neck can stop a heart or injure a brain in seconds, with no warning, no visible mark and no reliable way of telling it is happening. Nothing agreed between the two of you changes that, and a safe word is no use to somebody who cannot speak.
More in the same direction
- Medium · Half an hour
The agreement first
The half hour that makes the rest possible.
- BDSM · An hour and a half, thirty minutes of which is talking
The first scene
A short scene with everything around it in place.
- Hardcore · Two evenings, a week apart
What it costs
Not a scene. The way to find out what a thing takes before you do it.
What you both want.
Twenty questions, answered separately. You see only what you both said yes to.
Take the questionnaireFor adults over 18 only. Intended for two adults in a consenting relationship.